Can You Keep a Secret?--Emily Jensen

The Book Can You Keep a Secret? starts off with the narrartor, Emma, thinking a whole bunch of random thoughts while she is at a meeting representing Pather Corporation, in London. When she tries to impress Glen Oil's head guy she ends up having a Fizzy cranberry-flavored drink explode his shirt and his papers, which did not make him happy. So that pretty much ruined any chances of them wanting to finialize the promotion they were doing together. After that she had her flight back home, which she had just now realized she is scared of flying. So, to help calm her down she had a few drinks before the flight; she ended up being half drunk by the time she got on the plane. To make things worse, the plane started having very bad turbulence problems, which really freaked her out. So, she ended up just blirted out all her thoughts and secrets to the gentlemen sitting next to her. She was saying things like "I've never done anything to make my parents proud of me," and "...sometimes I water her stupid spider plant with orange juice, just to serve her right..." In the end they ended up landing safely, and she felt stupid for thinking they were all going to die and she told a complete stranger all these things about her. Then that next week she was in for a real surprise. At her work their inventor of the whole company, Jack Harper, was visiting the company. To her surprise it was the same guy she had told everything to on the plane. But to summarize all this part he remembered her and he started to become interested in her but she was dating this other guy, but over that week Jack would try to get chances to talk to Emma and he would always hint towards something that she had said in the plane. The last day that he was supposed to be in town they had an intense talk in the elevator and he questioned why she was even with the other guy and they got to a small arguement and then he got off the elevator. Later that day she broke it off with her boyfriend and then Jack found out and ended up staying til the next monday so he could talk to Emma and then he asked her out on a date.

I find this book pretty humorous because, Emma is just an ordianary young adult that has all this stuff happen to her. She can't make her parents proud, she doesn't hold a stable job for very long, tells the head boss EVERYTHING, almost gets caught having sex in the work place with herboyfriend, and then like the dumps her boyfriend. And where i left off she was just getting into the car with her multimillionare date.

Franzis Rios

" Libby has used the last of my sanitary towels to make hammocks for her dolls". In the book titled Angus, thongs and Full-Frontal Snogging the narrator has a journal that she writes in many times a day at different times. She has a younger sister in which her name is Libby. Libby can be very annoying and like you notices in the first sentence of my post she likes to experiment with things that aren't what they are used for. She has a very interesting looking cat which she had to beg her mother onto letting her bring home. Angus is the cat name, now Angus likes to fight with the neighbors small dog, making the neighbors better known as "Mr. and Mrs. Next Door not like Angus. though out the story so far it does not mention the narrators name. She really wants a boy friend and has many questions on how her first kiss would be. Now the char actor looks up to a teen magazine that she reads. She feel that she is very ugly and that no guy would want her. She has a what she calls "Sex God" that speaks to her which simply refers to when ever she thinks about kissing a boy or talking to a boy that she likes. This book is very interesting just because you get to read about things that a teen would write in a journal and her emotions yet humorous ways.

Sandra Salazar

when you first pick up this book i know you must think "i dont need a book to learn about guy." but in reality this book is actually pretty good and shows you many things you may not know yet. the back of this book basically gives it all. It describes what this book is about and how guys are not really that confusing, as we girls think they are. In reality were the one's confusing ourselves.

In this book the Author Greg Behrendt gives many women's advice on guys that are not worth their time. He says that guys rather make up excuses to why he cant call you or see you, than to straight up tell you he is not that into you. He explains that many women's set up excuses for why guys wont call them or see them, and they never actually take the time to ralize their just waisting their time and beauty on a loser that does not even want them.

Here are some examples from the book;

In chapter one Greg open's Liz eyes on man. she tries to make rational excuses for the men that wont call her or wont try to see her again, but Greg lets her and many other women know that as soon as they quit setting up excuses for this man, this man will dissapear out of their lives and they will have the chance to find a better guy that will be interested in them, and that will treat them how they deserve to be treated. He points out the lies that man use on the ladies just to try to avoid them; such as he is too busy, he is going througgh struggles, or that they dont want to ruin their friendship, etc. He points out guys in his lies, and many women's try to make excuses for this man just to keep hearing from them or seeing them. He makes girls see that their worth more than a guy that avoids you makes you feel like.
The humor in this book is good. This book hause made me laugh with grreg's sarcasm; like when in this part it says " so on this particular day, one of the ladies pipes up with, "Greg you're a guy." she is very observant, this one, for i am a guy." This kind of sarcasm had me laughing.

In chapter three Greg talks about how girls assume that if a guy wants to hang out, he is immediatly trying to date her. But on many occasions the girls take things the wrong ways and try to make excuses for thing, just so in their heads this love affair (thats not even happening) plays off right. I have only read first half of this book, and i must say i cant put this book down. Its humor makes me laugh like no other book before and the main message on guys has kind of taught me some things. My next post should approach very soon

Franzis rios

Funny in Farsi Anthony Simenson

This story makes fun of the new student in the class that knows a little english and doesn't understand most of what everyone is telling her. One day her mom went to school with her to see what its like and what to see what she goes though everyday at school. Her parents always do things that make her look funny, and she tries to tell them that, but they don't listen to her. One day during school her teacher asked them where Iran was at on the map, and none of them knew and the teacher pointed at a country and the mom just shook her head yes that is were it is and she just did that to make it look like she knew it all the time she just didn't want anyone else to know.

Al Capone Does My Shirts (Hannah Snyder)

Al Capone Does My Shirts is a novel that takes place on Alcatraz in 1935. Known by many Alcatraz held some of the most dangerous convicts such as Al Capone, the Birdman, and Machine gun Kelly. The main character, Matthew Flanagan, nicknamed 'Moose' due to his giant stature, is 15 when his family moves to Alcatraz due to his father's job as a prison guard. Moose is thrown into a whirlwind of new experiences and social drama.

Since the book is in a first person view, told from Moose, much of the humor revolves around his reactions to the stimulus. Other parts of the humor also is with his sister Natalie, her age is currently unknown, but their mother refers to her as being 10. Anyway... Moose is stuck with his sister after her rejection from a school, which doesn't seem too bad, except she has a psychological disorder, or so her family thinks. Being stuck with his sister brings more humor to the story, with her tagging along, the other Alcatraz kids find her strange, and weird, making it harder for Moose to make friends. Piper, the Warden's daughter, doesn't make things easier for Moose either, she drags Natalie and him into a whirlwind of trouble. He receives a warm welcome from the Warden when he is called in his house for a personal meeting. Here he is basically threatened by the Warden as he lays down the law for Moose.

First rule of Alcatraz: Don't about Alcatraz.

Unfortunately for Moose, Piper breaks this rule on the first day of Moose's arrival to the new school. Following her lead, he also breaks the rule, and upon breakage, Piper is able to blackmail Moose into helping her with a secret laundry service. On the island one of the convicts jobs is to wash the laundry. So, in an attempt to make some side money Piper devised a plan involving Moose much to his dismay. Currently in the midst of the book Piper's plan is working, including her blackmail against Moose.

Here is an example of the humor Natalie's disorder:

Moose is trying to get Natalie to change out of her bathing suit and into a dress so they can go outside to meet Piper.

I'm thinking I'm wasting my breath when Natalie starts to take off her suit, I walk out of my room and close the door.

"All done, Nat?" I ask when I hear her come out.

When I turn around she's standing in the living room totally naked

I can feel my whole face get red. Even the tips of my ears burn. I don't want to see my sister naked. "No! You can't do that!" I run to the front window and yank the drapes closed.

-Page 92-

This is just one of the many humorous parts of the story where Moose must struggle with his sister to do simple things.

Zombie Butts From Uranus

This is a brief summary of the first part of the novel.

To start the story off Zach is in a butt fighting simulator which he fails. After Failing the simulator Zach leaves his butt fighting academy to head home to his grandma. On his way home he runs into a psychic who can tell your future by feeling your butt. The "bum-feeler" tells him he will be the savior of man kind and gives him three pieces of advice, save the world with tomato sauce, do the hokey-pokey, and don't fear the brown hole.

Meanwhile Zach's scientist parents (James and Judi) got a sample bum from Uranus because they found out they are what make up the planets rings. while preforming and experiment they dissect the butt and notice that it regenerates itself!!! Shorty after they notice an object crash into Uranus and explodes. The explosion wakes up all the butts on the planet and the butt on board with James and Judi. The butt attaches itself to James' real butt, this causes James to attempt to eat his wife. Judi takes the butt off and then it attaches over her bum, James wakes up and snatches the butt and disposes of it. The two fly back down to Uranus to investigate the crash.

And this is where I leave you hanging till next time.